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Blago-style is for me

Blago

Don't get me wrong: Blago is a giant fucking douchebag. He is a taint on public service. Holding Obama's senate seat for ransom was bad enough, but a Children's Hospital? If only people worried half as much about what politicans do as opposed to, say, what religion they are... okay, I won't go there. I'm here to talk fashion.

Blagostarsky We must step back from the cesspool that is Rod Blagojevich and applaud the solitary orchid of purity that is Blago-style. Paul Schmelzer writes "A courtroom sketch this week by Cheryl Cook captures Blagojevich, apparently on his way to modeling sportswear in the 1983 JC Penney catalogue." What Schmelzer fails to note is how fucking cool that is. Blago is rocking that cornflower blue Nike windbreaker. Great for the tennis court, even better for the courtroom. Williamsburg douche-hunters, in all their vaped-up 80's slumming, are still eluded by the carefree cool of 80's tennis sportswear. Or maybe they were into it for 5 minutes, and it was tossed aside and forgotten, rather than savoured and appreciated.

There's one notable exception here, and that's Luke WIlson as Richie Tenenbaum. More Fila jackets, please!

Picture_20 We haven't talked about the most important part. The turtled-neck. The man wears turtlenecks under a Nike tracksuit to court. That says to me, "I'm not just any douchebag. I'm a classy douchebag and I love pussy."  You know who else wore turtlenecks under a jacket? Fucking Steve McQueen in Bullitt.

Granted, McQueen wore a tweed jacket, because that's what a cool pussy-hunting badass motherfucker did in 1968. Make McQueen's hair about 10 times bigger, put him in a windbreaker, shrink his balls about 30%... BAM! You've got Blago-style.

Blago-style is soulless, and always on the make. Blago-style cares not a fuck what you think. There are deals to make, legs to break, cocktails to shake and oh yeah – shitloads of pussy. (No need to rhyme that one.)

But those days are over for Blago. The flourish of Ocean Pacific-esque aqua marine jogging suits must now give way to the mid-80's cop drama funeral. Black turtleneck, flipped-up collar on a black leather jacket. Sweet move, Blago. Sweet move. Douchebag.

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December 11, 2008 at 04:22 PM in Dandy Foppery | Permalink

Comments

Cornflower blue is possibly the best color in the box of 64 crayons.

Posted by: wr3n at Dec 18, 2008 10:45:06 AM